5 Things Your Kids Will Fight Over When You’re Dead

I originally wanted this article to be a fun, light-hearted piece about a handful of nice items I have picked up along my sartorial journey that I imagine my kids will also think are cool when they get older and can appreciate that kind of stuff.

It was to be an article about buying less and buying better, so that the things you accumulate are of high quality and will last. It was to be about timeless style and not adhering to trends.

This article will still have some of those things.

I should have titled the article “5 Things Your Kids Will Want To Steal From You When They Get Older”. Unfortunately, I put the whole “Dead” thing in there and now, well, here we are.

I’m not sure why that happened.

I think it’s because we dads are always looking to, not only protect our families, but equip our children for when we can no longer have a tangible, physical effect on them when they are away from us for any length of time. At school, at a sleepover, at college, when they eventually move out and start families of their own. And yes, even when we are gone.

Equip them with what? With skills for life, sure. But with memories. With warm thoughts and reassurances that they are loved and that they’re special and that they matter to someone.

Since I like clothes, they tend to be the things I think about first when I think about making lasting memories for my kids.

One of the reasons this article took a more somber turn than originally intended was because I read an article the other day on PutThisOn.com about a gentleman who inherited two watches from his late father. One was a gold Rolex. The other was a digital Seiko.

The gist of the article, titled “What Makes Something An Heirloom?”, was that the “best” or most expensive things aren’t always the things we treasure once a loved one is gone. What makes an item special to us are the memories we have of that item that are closely associated with the person in question.

The author of the article, Mr. Edwin Zee, felt absolutely no connection to the gold Rolex, since his dad never really wore it. Conversely, the cheap digital Seiko had much more emotional resonance since it was the watch his dad wore every single day. The Seiko represented his dad far more than the Rolex did.

So, what are the things your kids will hope you to bequeathed to them in your will? Well, read on for my top five selections.

These items do not need to be expensive, mind you. However, they do need to be of high enough quality as to ensure longevity.

#1 – Watch (or any other form of jewelry)

I’m listing the watch first since I just mentioned it. If you wear a watch, or any other form of jewelry, with any regularity it will be something your kids will probably be interested in when they get older.

As evidenced by the article I cited earlier, the watch need not be a luxury piece. As long as it’s still ticking years down the line, then any watch will do.

Your kids will remember clinging to your arm (and the watch) as they splash in the ocean. They’ll remember futzing with the timing bezel to pass the time in a restaurant. They’ll remember you using it to teach them how to tell time. They’ll remember seeing it in all the pictures of your wedding. They’ll remember your watch tan.

They’ll remember you showing them that it already has been five more minutes.

#2 – Leather Jacket

I own two leather jackets. One is a brown, G-1 flight jacket with a fur collar that I wear in the winter. It’s pretty roomy which is perfect for layering thick sweaters underneath.

The other is a black, Schott Perfecto double-rider motorcycle jacket with a red flannel lining. The fit on that one is pretty trim so I wear it in the fall and spring when I don’t need to layer too heavily.

If my sons have any good sense then they are going to love these things when they are older.

A few months ago, my wife and I had an interaction which helps illustrate why a leather jacket is a great heirloom.

It was early spring and we were visiting her parents. The boys were running around in the yard before dinnertime and my wife and I were sitting on the front porch with glasses of wine. My wife got chilly so I took off my Perfecto and draped it over her shoulders. She commented on how heavy and warm the jacket felt. Also, it smelled good.

That’s one thing I absolutely love about leather jackets: the smell. No matter how much wear my leather jackets get, they still smell like I am holding a baseball glove up to my face.

Seeing my wife snuggled up in my jacket on a brisk evening really made me smile. I felt like I was protecting her. That’s what we dads are always trying to do: provide protection for our wives and children.

A leather jacket is a great way to do that.

#3 – Hat

The first article I ever wrote for this site was about my dad’s hat. He always wore a tweed newsboy cap. Always. Even in the summer. When he died, there were a few of his caps that made their way into my possession. Unfortunately, I could never wear them, as my hat size was considerably larger than my dad’s.

Hats, provided they fit, are great things to hand down to your kids for a few reasons.

One, they are super durable. A tweed cap is virtually indestructible. A fedora is made of fur and leather. These things are made to take a beating, which means they last for decades if given even a modicum of care.

Two, they are timeless. A cap or fedora is going to look just as cool fifty years from now as it did fifty years ago.

Three, since hats are a bit unique nowadays, you are instantly recognizable if you wear one. That means that your kids will remember it and associate it with you.

I am not sure which of my hats will appeal to my kids when they get older. Like my dad, I have a few tweed caps. I also have a half-dozen felt hats, mostly Stetsons and Akubras. I imagine my straw hats won’t survive too many more years.

I have always loved hats, so maybe my kids will just carry on hat-wearing in general without having any specific connection to a particular hat.

#4 – Tweed Sport Coat

This one will be a bit more difficult to pass down to your kids, if they have different body types.

Like his hats, if my dad has left me a sport coat, I wouldn’t have been able to fit into it, as my dad was much smaller than me. However, your kids don’t need to be exactly your size, or even your same gender to get some use out of a great tweed sport coat! If it’s a little too big for them, they can wear it more as outerwear.

Tweed sport coats make better heirlooms than worsted wool jackets. Their texture and thick material make it so that they can suffer the slings and arrows of a life roughly-lived and still look as good as the day they were purchased. That is the beauty of clothes meant for country pursuits.

This jacket will invoke, in your children, memories of Thanksgiving dinners and winter church services. They’ll remember how you always wore this jacket when you traveled, and hope to wear it on some of their own adventures.

#5 – Sweater

I wrote an article a while back about my dad’s cashmere sweater. If that sweater had still been in his possession when he died, I absolutely would have claimed it.

For the purpose of this section, when I say “sweater” I don’t mean those thin, merino numbers that slide effortlessly under a tailored jacket.

When I say “sweater” I mean a sweater. A thick, beefy sweater. A sweater that looks like it has processed its fair share of whale oil.

This is a sweater that should smell of woodsmoke. There should be pulls in the stiches from roughhousing with the children. Your kids should remember cuddling up to you on your living room chair as you read them stories. This is the sweater they remember you wearing when they would creep out of their rooms at night to listen to you and your wife chat over drinks by the fire.

Your kids will question whether or not this sweater has ever been dry-cleaned. That’s a good thing.

This list is more than just about having cool stuff to pass down to your kids. It’s about the cool stuff that you have given meaning because they belonged to YOU.

Just like how Mr. Zee feels nothing for his dad’s Rolex, none of this stuff has any significance unless you actually wear it.

So, wear it. And get your picture taken wearing it.

Also, and I say this all the time, if you have LESS stuff, it will make the stuff you do have more meaningful. If you have twenty jackets, your kids aren’t going to care about them because they won’t remember you ever wearing any particular one. If you have only one or two, then every single time they think of you in a jacket, it will be the same image.

Now, I listed the five things that I think are great things to pass along to your kids. You may have a totally different list. That’s fine. Like I said, these things don’t have to be expensive. They do, however, need to be of high enough quality that they stand up to the ravages of time. They can’t be delicate.

What will your kids fight over when you’re dead?