Summer is in full swing which means a lot of people are going to be attending weddings soon. Some of you might even be hosting one of your own!

Many people decide to implement dress codes for their weddings, and those dress codes sometimes include “black tie”.

Now, there are a ton of resources on the internet already that will tell you ALL about black tie and how to do it properly. In a surprise to no one, I even did my own guide to black tie some time ago.

In that guide, I didn’t rehash all the information that’s readily available on how to put together your own proper tuxedo. Instead, I tried to clear away some of the confusion around the many rules regarding that specific dress code in order to make you feel more comfortable tackling it. I wanted to offer practical guidance on how to do black tie rather than regurgitate what the rules were.

Now that we are in full-blown “wedding season” I got to thinking about one particular sticking point when it came to black tie… namely, footwear, as this is the part of black tie that many men find the most challenging to get right.

Most people are aware that the “correct” shoe to wear with a tuxedo is a black, patent-leather oxford. Patent-leather is a high-gloss, mirror-shine type of leather that, as a man, you would really only find on tuxedo shoes. “Oxford” (when it comes to shoes) means that the lacing is “closed”. Closed lacing means that the part where the laces attach is essentially on the same “level” as the rest of the upper (either in a “wholecut” like the shoes in the main article picture or stitched there like the shoes in the picture below). Basically, it’s the most formal representation of a lace-up shoe.

But shoes are murky territory when it comes to menswear.

If I get a jacket or a pair of trousers and they are maybe a little off in fit, then it’s not really that big of a deal. Honestly, none of my jackets or pants fit exactly the same. Some are a little fuller cut or a bit trimmer. Some jackets are longer than others. Some have more extended shoulders.

Shoes, though, need to be pretty bang-on when it comes to fit, otherwise spending any amount of time in them is unbearable.

Shoes can also be quite expensive.

Lastly, many of us men already have some variation of black, dress shoes in our closets.

So, the question many men encounter upon building their own black tie rig is…

Can I wear my regular, black, dress shoes with my tuxedo? Or will it look like I don’t know what I am doing?

Take it from me… YES, you can absolutely wear the same black shoes you wear with all your other suits with your tuxedo!

Now, there are some caveats to that statement. You HAVE to shine those puppies as best as you damn well can! Also, they need to be free from any sort of broguing pattern, even if there is only a minimal amount.

Can they be cap-toes? Yes! They can be.

Can they be open-laced (meaning a “derby” construction, which is different than an oxford)? Again, yes!

Now, some of you purists out there might be appalled that I am telling men it’s ok to wear their calf-leather, cap-toed, derbies with a dinner suit.

Don’t worry, I am well-aware that that style of shoe is undoubtedly less-formal than a proper patent-leather oxford. But I have two main reasons for my advice…

One is practicality. Like I said, most men already have a perfectly serviceable pair of black dress shoes in their closets. Those shoes are comfortable and reliable. Those men can walk, dance, and party in them till the cows come home, which will help ensure they enjoy themselves at whatever shindig they are attending. And while a brand new dinner suit can be made comfortable with a quick trip to the tailor, it is much more difficult to find a comfortable pair of shoes. For those of us who find it difficult to find shoes that fit well, having a serviceable pair already at the ready makes preparing for a formal event much less stressful, not to mention less costly.

My second reason has to do with the “spirit” of the rules of black tie. The rule that says you need to wear certain shoes with your tuxedo is really implying that you need to wear a formal shoe that doesn’t pull focus from the rest of your outfit. It needs to blend in with the formality and color of the rest of your rig. In that sense, a well-polished, black, business shoe is perfectly appropriate. No one will notice… and I say that not in a “you can get away with it because most people don’t even know what a proper black tie ensemble is supposed to look like” kind of a way, but in a “it will blend in with the rest of your outfit so that even people who know proper black tie won’t even notice or care” kind of a way.

Is a black, patent-leather oxford BETTER than a regular, business shoe? Of course it is. But if the regular, business shoe is the only one you have, then it’s perfectly fine to wear it with your tux.

I sometimes see advice on the internet that says “Well, if you’re spending the money on a tuxedo, then you should just go ahead and spend the money on the proper shoes!”

It’s like, ok maybe not all of us have an extra few hundred dollars to drop on fancy, party shoes after we have ALREADY spent a lot of money on the tuxedo itself.

Versatility is a virtue in menswear (and fatherhood!) so I LIKE the fact that my black, dress shoes can pull double-duty if I need them to.

Now, I can’t talk about black tie footwear without mentioning formal opera pumps.

Formal pumps basically look like ballet flats for men. They are very dainty (also patent-leather) and usually have little bows on the front.

They are the most formal type of shoe that any man will likely ever encounter. You can wear them with black tie or white tie.

A word of warning, however, for the wearing of formal opera pumps… to 99% of people who see you wearing them, they will look VERY girly. It will look like you borrowed your wife’s shoes for the evening.

Most people who see them will think they look super feminine, so make sure you understand that if you choose to wear them. You need a bit of an “F-U” attitude if you’re going to wear opera pumps.

Approach the wearing of opera pumps with caution. I wrote in my article about wearing a silk scarf with a tuxedo that when you wear a tux, you want to look like James Bond not Louis XVI. You want to look strong and mature and MANLY. A silk scarf won’t accomplish that, and, unfortunately, neither will opera pumps.

Unless your wife is a menswear weirdo like you, she is probably going to prefer you wear some regular shoes with your tuxedo. Women LOVE men in tuxedos… but I don’t know of any who drool over men in opera pumps.

And before you come after me with your pitchforks, thinking opera pumps look girly doesn’t make me stupid, unenlightened, or uneducated.

So, all that said, would I wear opera pumps if I had them? YES, I would! I wear rock the hell out of opera pumps with my tuxedo! But I am very comfortable in a tux, as I have had a lot of practice. Opera pumps are kind of a “IYKYK” kind of thing. And I would wear them more for a lark than anything else, since they are so unusual and feel so anachronistic. I would feel like I was wearing a powdered wig for the evening.

Basically, I wouldn’t make opera pumps a permanent, recurring staple of my black tie rig, as I prefer the stronger, more masculine look of lace-up shoes.

Think of footwear for black tie the way you think about all the other “rules” of black tie (or really, menswear in general)… what is the “spirit” of the rule in question?

Is the rule about wearing black, patent-leather oxfords really about needing to wear those specific shoes? Not really, I would argue. The spirit of the rule is that you should wear something black and formal, and something that blends in with the rest of your outfit and doesn’t clash (too much) with the formality of everything else you’re wearing.

Getting dressed up in a tux should be fun. Don’t let your footwear choice be a source of stress.